Dear God, please do not let this turn out to be another byproduct of movie magic. If those nips are the work of a very talented person at a computer, or a dude with a crayon, then I am going to have to start doubting everything else I accept as reality. Was that hamburger that I ate for lunch real? Am I actually wearing clothes right now? Am I only living in a dream within a dream and I need Leonardo Dicaprio to come rescue me? Damn, I need to quit it with the deep thinking. No good is coming from that.
Instead I will choose to accept Micaela Schafer as a genetic oddity. Perhaps she is the result of selective breeding from a remote village. Generation after generation, with unique oblong shaped nipples, have been producing offspring with nipples that have become exceedingly stranger. That is until they have reached this perfection.
Sure, some nipples were wasted. The triangles and the trapezoids needed to be discarded, but such is the price of progress. For all I know Hallmark could have funded the whole operation. They have been needing a way to bolster Valentine's Day sales and now they might have achieved it.