This might be getting a little too philosophical, but does it really count as a bare ass if it is covered in sand? I think Plato struggled with this same dilemma without ever coming to a proper conclusion. All I am saying is that I have seen plenty of models wearing paint on their bodies and I have never felt like I was seeing them in the nude. It is in this weird grey area that not even the law knows how to handle.
So much is already being revealed by current swimsuits that it seems like women are running out of ways to push the boundaries of acceptability. I thought we reached the height of risque fashion a couple of decades ago with the invention of the thong, but it appears I was mistaken. If sand can be used as an acceptable concealer then I see a new golden age upon the horizon. If sandy cheeks become in vogue then there will be no haven for the involuntary erections of teenagers. I am just thankful that I have already reached a respectable level of dick control that I can see the sights in relative safety.
Photo Credit: Snapchat