Dua Lipa Wears a Sheer Dress for Marketing!

In today’s edition of “Yes, That’s Fabric (Barely),” pop’s most gorgeously marketable hologram, Dua Lipa, was caught backstage of her tour in a sheer dress so transparent you could see her next single through it, or at least her next viral tiktok song and her underwear.

Nothing screams "deep musical artistry" quite like a dress that is basically purple cling wrap.

Not that Dua Lipa is really known for her "artistry", she's more of a concept or viral video in music form. Her father was a digital marketer and he was able to find catching marketing jingles to push on the TikTok machine.

Now she is the machine! One of the most-streamed artists alive, Dua continues to dress like she’s one outfit away from a Vegas residency because good music is nice, but catchy music is better, and in this fast food nation, we need all the hype we can get, which is why visible underwear is essentially the viral video or viral song of outfits.

Dua’s entire career is a beautifully engineered Spotify algorithm wrapped in legs and seduction. She’s less “songwriter” and more “PowerPoint presentation in a thong,” designed by an elite team of hitmakers, hairstylists, and hydration specialists to keep your attention just long enough to click “Buy Tickets.”

It's working. The sheer dress is doing more promo than her actual lyrics. ("Did she rhyme ‘Motion’ with ‘Ocean’ again? What about that song where she writes 'Tonight' and 'Light', not that she writes anything! She's just here to give you the clickbait!