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Bruce Wayne Dons His Disturbing Suit-With-Nipples and Armored Kevlar Codpiece Once Again for Batman: Arkham Origins (VIDEO)

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chris-littlechild - April 11, 2013

As anybody with an intimate knowledge of the Gamingverse can attest (and we sure hope you at least bought the Gamingverse dinner before any intimacy took place, you randy bastard), Batman has singlehandedly hauled the reputation of superhero video games out of the shit in recent years. Arkham City and its predecessor, Arkham Asylum, were much-ballyhooed action romps in their own right, irrespective of the fact that they starred the iconic vigilante with the gravelier than a full-scale replica of the Chrysler building made of gravel voice.

Which was quite a feat on developer Rocksteady's part, as we know. Such licensed business is usually a festering heap of horsecrap (see also: movie tie-ins), so the ‘game of the year' nominations and critical acclaim for these free-roaming action adventures is all the more remarkable. It won't surprise even the simplest of us, then (you there, sucking your shirt! We meanyou), that a fresh installment is on the way.


Dubbed Batman: Arkham Origins, this prequel is the first to be developed by Warner Bros. Games Montreal (with access to the previous games' custom Unreal engine). The premise is that a more youthful, less middle-aged-spread-y ("Shall we let your utility belt out a little more, Mr. Wayne? Perhaps a corset integrated in your suit?") Batman will be beset by eight assassins, all of whom have descended upon Gotham City to kill him. This notion allows for Arkham debuts from such DC Comics stalwarts as Deathstroke, and the opportunity to traverse the streets of Gotham themselves; piss-soaked hobo-alleys and all.

Are you as excited and/or constipated as Batman himself appears to be by this revelation? Yes, yes you are. Image source: www.gamerant.com

Just why this attack in ensuing on Christmas Eve is a mystery, but it lends a pleasing Die Hard air (in the festive fisticuffs sense) to proceedings. Perhaps, if you're attentive while roaming about the city, you'll see Bruce Willis dangling an angry German dude from a window on the thirtieth floor by his watchstrap. It's unlikely, we'll concede, but come the -prospective- October release, we'll sure as all hell be looking.

To gather a few more of the scant info-nuggets that have thus far been released, hit gameinformer, and behold their fleeting trailer-of-sorts footage above.




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