earl-jonas - July 29, 2019
Ho boy do we have a find for you. Move over The Lion King. A new box office slayer is in town. Strange Tales From Appalachia is now streaming on Amazon Prime, which means you can be take in all the luscious b-movie - or actually let's call this a d(cup)-movie - frontal and backal nudity. A friendly reminder - pretty much anyone can upload pretty much anything they want to Amazon Prime. Want in? Just head here.
The streaming platform relies on crowdsourcing more than you might imagine, and we stan. Why do we stan? Because cripplingly independent filmmakers love making horror movies featuring naked chicks. Strange Tales From Appalachia is actually comprised of three different 30-minute shorts that each tackle a spooky song of the South. All three different filmmakers responsible for the shorts are from East Tennessee, yet none of them were able to hunt down Dolly Parton for a tit shot? Boo. Here's the jizz-st:
Appalachian filmmakers join together to produce three horrifying, suspenseful, and strange tales. In "Pretty Girl", a young woman escapes a maniac kidnapper by fleeing into the Appalachian wilderness. Aided by a group of friendly hikers, she must escape the woods or face her darkest fears. "Man Vs Ghost" is the story of an over-the-top host of a public access ghost-hunting show and his sister, who fear that some "ghosts" may be following her home. Desperate for a season finale he can sell to the Travel Channel, the "Ghost Man" tries to cash in on his sister's paranoia to produce the perfect episode, but may get more than he bargained for. An average Joe is kidnapped and trapped in makeshift death match arena in "The Room". Forced to fight or be killed, he must find the will to survive against all odds.
Sarah Deatherage is a BBW and shows off all of her goods during a spookily shitty scene. Well that's it. Hey its Monday. We're just warming up. Enjoy...