Ilvy Kokomo Topless with Bullets

I love it when a woman knows how to properly accessorize their belongings with their bodies. I would bet she was lounging around her lake house one day thinking, "I wonder what would go best with my torpedo boobs? I know, I will put on my combat boots and that belt of ammunition I got at the gun show."  How long does it take to get fitted for an ammo belt, and do I need any special permits? Who am I kidding, I do not have the hips to pull off a look like that. 

What look is she going for anyway? If it is boner material, then mission accomplished. But if it is sexy Stalin, then I am conflicted. My grandfather always taught me that it is better to be dead than red, but Ilvy makes quite the strong case for conversion. I would not mind calling her comrade during a cold winter. With a body and a name that seems like it was taken straight out of Beach Boys song how can a man not stop and weigh his options?

_{Photo Credit: Tycho Herf}